Before I had kids I had no idea how hard it was and looked down my nose at little brats running through the shops and wondering why their parents didn’t stop them.
Then I had a child and I became someone who looked at people who didn’t have kids with a snort of smugness – “HA!, they don’t know how easy they’ve got it”. Wait till its them trying to get a stroller through the skinny checkout or keeping a toddler out of the makeup at priceline.
Then I had a 2nd child. I had no idea how hard it is.
I wonder if parents of 3 kids look at me with two and think – she doesn’t know how easy shes got it!
There is one word that sums up how I feel now having two young children = Pressure.
Pressure to know what I’m doing with the baby because its my 2nd one. And the endless “are you feeding him again??” well every 3 to 4 hours seems normal to me. And that he takes an hour to feed. “In my day we fed 10 minutes each side” Maybe when he is 6 months old I will stick to that but not a newborn! I will let him feed as long as he likes.
Pressure to keep my toddler entertained and well behaved while I’m tierd and always busy with the baby.
Pressure from myself to have time for my toddler and get out of the house.
Pressure to get the housework done, dinner on the table, all while looking after a baby that cluster feeds in the afternoon and a toddler who has her own needs.
Pressure to work out some kind of balance between myself and my husband of chores and childcare.
Needless to say we look forward to Thursdays when we go to playgroup. We are out all day, my toddler gets social interaction and if I’m lucky my baby sleeps for some time and I get some one-on-one with my 3 year old. I also get to talk to other mums who have had done their time in the “two babies” scenario and also those who don’t and it keeps me sane!
Thankgod for playgroup.